Monday, January 5, 2009

realizations

i took off 2 weeks during the last of the year 2008. 2 weeks of not being at work. 2 weeks of no routine. 2 weeks of staying at home, knitting, crocheting and staying pretty much in my pajamas.

oh, sure, there were those days of my friend coming in from texas to visit us for 5 days. only 5 days. i love my friend and would have loved to have her for the entire 2 weeks but, well, she has family and duties of her own.

out of those 2 weeks away from work, 1 of those ended up with me being sick as a dog with a head/chest cold. like my husband says, when i get sick i get sick.

realizations:

1) i need routine. during my 2 weeks of no routine i suddenly realized last night that i neglected to take my anti-sadness meds. i realized this as i became aware of the fact that i was intensely sad and for no reason at all. without my routine i don't remember to do things like take the needed meds.

2) i cannot be a stay-at-home person. this is a previously noted realization that was reinforced this past 2 weeks. i also cannot be a work-from-home person. i cannot set boundaries. i will either not do enough work or i will work until the wee hours.

3) i cannot think of a number 3. i think this is because i have difficulty concentrating (see number 1 above). gotta not forget the meds.

so, there you go. i don't do resolutions, i do realizations.